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Controversial Social Issues Discussions concerning controversial social issues. Topics include politics, religion, culture, social and economic issues, etc. Respect required at all times.


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Old 10-19-2012, 04:36 PM
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The Fine Line Between Monitoring Your Kids and Spying

Too many political threads in this section. Had to start something with a different topic to discuss.

The members who have kids or who don't, please read the blog post before you post your

Quote:
The debate was heated: a room full of 4th grade parents in a PTA online safety meeting was equally divided on the issue of whether monitoring interfered with a child’s right to privacy. On the one side were parents who advocated the use of all the tech tools at our disposal; on the other were parents who suggested this amounted to nothing less than spying.

Like it or not, today’s technology allows you to know virtually everything your child is doing –- from recording what she types on a computer (key logging) to tracking texts and receiving transcripts of all her Facebook posts. Indeed, you have the power to know just what your child is saying, doing and — perhaps — even thinking.

More moderate child safety advocates like connectsafely.org have...
Continued at: http://mashable.com/2012/10/19/monit...spy-fine-line/

Thoughts on this?
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Old 10-19-2012, 04:44 PM
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Snake, I have four children and the only 2 that allow to be online are my oldest. And although I speak to my boys and talk frankly with them about the dangers associated with the internet, I let them use it.

It's my right to be a spy and noone will change my mind.
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Old 10-21-2012, 05:45 PM
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Here is another issue you all can weight in on. It is a form of spying on your kids at school. Started in Texas.

http://video.today.msnbc.msn.com/today/49487099?__utma=14933801.1211856698.1349989495.135 0837736.1350862602.15&__utmb=14933801.2.10.1350862 602&__utmc=14933801&__utmx=-&__utmz=14933801.1350862602.15.15.utmcsr=msn.com|u tmccn=(referral)|utmcmd=referral|utmcct=/&__utmv=14933801.|8=Earned%20By=msnbc%7Cus%20news% 7Cusnewsfranchise=1^12=Landing%20Content=Original= 1^13=Landing%20Hostname=usnews.nbcnews.com=1^30=Vi sit%20Type%20to%20Content=Internal%20to%20Original =1&__utmk=78230932#49487099

Not sure why this is so long. But maybe it will work?
 
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Old 10-21-2012, 06:38 PM
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That article wasn't all that strong but the topic is a great one.

IMO, if they haven't learned right from wrong by the age of 12 you have already failed as a parent. That doesn't mean no supervision because even the best of us do a little better while being watched.

I raised three of which I am proud (all of them). Online in the modern sense of the word only existed for the youngest, a boy who was 16+ at the time so I never had to monitor or implement any serious control.

If we were 30 years in the past and things are as they are now I would be known as the "mean old daddy" because I would use any and all tools at my disposal to protect and steer my children in the right direction. As adults they may choose their own course and I will love them as they are.

Edit: Knew I missed something. That fine line is a subjective opinion and I would err on the side of supervision.
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Old 10-22-2012, 09:16 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snakeair View Post
Too many political threads in this section. Had to start something with a different topic to discuss.
That's the election season

Quote:
The members who have kids or who don't, please read the blog post before you post your



Continued at: http://mashable.com/2012/10/19/monit...spy-fine-line/

Thoughts on this?
My thought is that if you need to monitor your kids through softwares or other electronic systems, the bottom line is that you failed as parents because in most cases you did not teach them very well.

Unfortunately, these corporations will do anything to make a few bucks even promoting their softwares for spying on your wife/husband, and why not the grand pa/ grand ma
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Old 10-22-2012, 04:33 PM
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No one has said it yet but I suspect I am the odd man out in this thread.

I am not going to post any of the lurid details here but I suspect that if these parents http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/49400497...e#.UIXIUmfF2eE had been as aggressive as possible (and maybe they were) about what their child was doing online they might be feeling just a bit less guilty than they probably are.

My sincere condolences to the the family involved. I only posted this to try to help others.
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Old 10-22-2012, 07:56 PM
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As a teenager I feel like kids deserve a little privacy to talk about things that they may not feel comfortable with their parents knowing. And if their parents know something personal to the child they shouldn't try to bring it up because it WILL make things awkward.
 
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Old 10-24-2012, 11:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Natural Elements View Post
That's the election season



My thought is that if you need to monitor your kids through softwares or other electronic systems, the bottom line is that you failed as parents because in most cases you did not teach them very well.

Unfortunately, these corporations will do anything to make a few bucks even promoting their softwares for spying on your wife/husband, and why not the grand pa/ grand ma
When in the world did kids get the right to privacy?? Privacy and trust are not a right as a child they are something that is earned through behavior and display of being trustworthy.

The reasons that so many children are susceptible to such things are really to many to mention, the reason that there is such trouble with many of today's youth is because they are given status before they have earned that status. I am not talking about taking a belt to your kids, nor am I talking about screaming at them or putting a camera in their room, I am talking about the traditional parent child roll where the children are children and the parents are parents/teachers.

"My House My Rules" you want to make your own rules? Get your own house...that is what all of my kids follow, that is what I followed and my parents before me and so on....but wait as a later teen and an adult I never had to be told that as I knew it simply out of respect as I was taught to respect my parents and elders, and others period.

The family unit should not be a democracy, it is a dictatorship
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Old 10-24-2012, 01:27 PM
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I will have to agree with you. The kids nowadays have no idea what respect is. I have asked some of them. Yes the punishment fits the crime so to speak. If my child is getting ready to go into the street without me they will get a spanking they won't soon forget. I want to make an impression on the child that could get them killed, hurt, crippled. I am not talking a belt either although I was raised that way. Kids need boundries. Plain and simple. If you don't care why should they? Some kids turn out good in spite of their parents and others use their parents as an excuse.

I don't believe you can trust a kid because they are going to try stuff it is in their DNA! Particularly when they become teenagers and you become stupid or don't understand or that was in your day and its different now. Or so and so parents let them do it why can't I? Sound familiar?
 
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Old 10-24-2012, 01:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by webcrafters View Post
The family unit should not be a democracy, it is a dictatorship
I think you resumed pretty well your view there.
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Old 10-24-2012, 02:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Natural Elements View Post
I think you resumed pretty well your view there.
I tried not to beat around the bush to much :-)

We have had similar discussions here that have dealt with various situations. It all comes down to psychology really. Take away the fear or pain of loss and you make someone who does not put value to it. Give children free reign to do as they please and they become blurred to the topic of right and wrong, as weebitty said, lack of boundaries.

Though some may not like to accept it, and there are a plethora of different paradigms on this same subject it really all comes down to behaviorism. I mean there are several different types of psychology but we are a product of a number of different things taking us back to the nature vs. nurture idea.

How is it that we learn to deal with emotions? If we become enraged how do we learn to let out that rage in a non-destructive manner versus stabbing or shooting someone, or blowing something up? When we compete and we lose, or win, how do we learn how to deal with that revelation? At what point or age should we start learning it? Then the question becomes who is it that should teach it and how?

In my opinion taking out the keeping score process in children's sports does not help but rather really hurts this process. Immediately replacing a toy every time it is lost or destroyed, not responding by structured discipline that is structured to severity is all aspects of things that inhibits the intellectual and emotional development of a person. This all begins when we are children, small children at that.
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Old 10-24-2012, 02:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by webcrafters View Post
I tried not to beat around the bush to much :-)
Yes I saw that

I assume that educating and teaching your kids are natural, as a parent you don't need lessons, or to spy on them with electronic devices or softwares.

Parents need to take some times with their kids and teach them the rules of life so they can have their own experiences. You just have to find the just balance to let them breathe and in the same time teach them what they should learn from you. What your learned from the life and your parents play also an important role. It doesn't mean that you should apply all of what your parents teached you, because once again contemporary lifes and experiences are not absolute.
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