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  #21 (permalink)  
Old 03-14-2009, 10:13 AM
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I was absolutely kidding.

First kiss ain't happening until at least 30.
 
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  #22 (permalink)  
Old 03-14-2009, 10:42 AM
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The only things that really scare me about my daughter is:
  • her succumbing to some health issue that comes out of the blue
  • date rape
  • getting hurt due to someone else's ignorance
...other than that I have full confidence in everything she does. I'm lucky because even at close to 14 years old she displays more common sense in one day than I have much of my lifetime. Maybe I just have parental blinders on or maybe I'm just blessed, either way the only true emotion I feel is separation anxiety when she's at her mothers (I'm a weekend dad).

I have done my best to raise her based off my vivid memories of my own life growing up. I started speaking to her about sex when she turned 7 or 8 simply because I caught part of an episode of Operah that had girls on their who'd been pregnant as early as age 11. Of course it was extremely watered down at first but now that she's 14 she knows pretty much everything and the knowledge has come gradually. Tiering serious topics over several years made it easy on both of us as the topic never became awkward to discuss and now if she has a question she's the one who initiates the discussion, not me. Incidentally, we both reached an agreement that she wouldn't even date until 15 even though all of her friends are dating.

We've been discussing drugs, date rape, abduction and all other serious issues in this manner as well so she should be pretty well prepared.

I read somewhere that our kids are 3 years more aware that we were at the same age; this is the reason I started discussing serious issues when she was quite young. Some may argue that it was too early but my argument back to them is better too early than too late and my daughter has responded extremely well.

I also know she'll want to drive but around here we have some of the worst drivers in the world if you ask me (Vancouver BC). For this reason I've found a nice, deserted, open area and started teaching my daughter to drive at 13. I figure if I let her practice now and then up until 16, she'll have no troubles getting her license and not be a menace to our roads as so many teens are these days. Yes I do realize this is illegal hence the reason I had to find an area where no one is under risk other than my daughter and me.

The fact is that your kids are going to grow up and there's nothing you can do about it other than embrace it, enjoy all the stages and keep yourself active in their lives.

...I do know this formula has worked for me as I don't worry that much at all.
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  #23 (permalink)  
Old 03-14-2009, 11:16 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alter-ego View Post
...
I read somewhere that our kids are 3 years more aware that we were at the same age; this is the reason I started discussing serious issues when she was quite young. Some may argue that it was too early but my argument back to them is better too early than too late and my daughter has responded extremely well.
...
That is a good point! I sometimes let my little one watch the news with me, it triggers questions and raises issues we can talk about. My thinking is, if they are old enough to ask questions then they are old enough to understand the answer. (Obviously we don't go into the worst that life brings to our screens, we do censor a little.)
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Old 03-14-2009, 11:39 AM
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If you haven't managed to teach them right from wrong by age 12, nothing you will do later will change that.

At some point you have to give the impression you have cut them loose because you trust them. Of course you really don't cut them loose. You still watch and worry.
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Old 03-14-2009, 11:47 AM
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My daughter (5 remember) had her first sleepover the other night. When I dropped her off she said, "Daddy I promise we won't talk about boys." My chin is still bruised. I mean wha???
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Old 03-14-2009, 11:50 AM
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Incidentally she only made it till 1 AM and our phone rang and I had to go get her. By then we were in angst without her so it was great! Mom and Dad - 1...sleepover/friends - zip!
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Old 03-14-2009, 04:11 PM
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Enjoy it while you can Muddy. In another ten years it will be you looking for her at 1 AM.
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