Inter-Racial Marriages

contextual staff · 06-22-2007, 12:16 AM

So, I'm an Australian living in Japan and it has crossed my mind that I may marry a Japanese girl (preferably 18, still a virgin and willing to serve her husband).
But in reality how long could a interracial marriage last? Cultural differences, difficulties understanding humor, etc etc could pose a recipe for divorce. Any advice from those of you living in a mixed ethnicity relationship would be greatly appreciated.

**John Scott** · 06-22-2007, 12:50 AM

Like any marriage, expect it to last 7.8 years.

briggidere · 06-22-2007, 12:59 AM

i think if you are already asking yourself these questions you need to consider if you love her at all.

If you love her and want to spend the rest of you life with her then it will feel right.

You will already know the humour and cultural differences you have, so it's up to you if you like that or not.

potchie · 06-22-2007, 01:13 AM

ows, i dont want to get married to the person that obviously different culture as well as different in life living. but i believe in love and, of that love can change everything... i dont want to get married just to serve and be serve, i wanted to be equal, from respect and humility.

StrongInTheArm · 06-22-2007, 02:04 AM

Communication, understanding and respect. Its a start, but only a start.

Realize it is the more difficult path, consequently it takes greater effort.

Having walked this path, and still walking it after 15 years, I would advise you to only start this journey if your heart is truely, 100% involved and your mind is not clouded by lust. You will need to compromise and adjust your thinking, wishes and dreams. It is not just your life and her life but also the lives of those around you that may be affected.

This is a decision that requires time for the making. You need to make it together, preferably with both your families.

(Don't ever tell me the odds.)

gannik · 06-22-2007, 02:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrongInTheArm

Communication, understanding and respect. Its a start, but only a start.

Realize it is the more difficult path, consequently it takes greater effort.

Having walked this path, and still walking it after 15 years, I would advise you to only start this journey if your heart is truely, 100% involved and your mind is not clouded by lust. You will need to compromise and adjust your thinking, wishes and dreams. It is not just your life and her life but also the lives of those around you that may be affected.

This is a decision that requires time for the making. You need to make it together, preferably with both your families.

(Don't ever tell me the odds.)

Well-said. Good for you. It's felt that is the answer of the adult experienced man.

pctec · 06-22-2007, 05:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by John Scott

Like any marriage, expect it to last 7.8 years.

I guess I have beat the odds...
It will be 19 years for me in October.

StrongInTheArm · 06-22-2007, 05:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pctec

... 19 years for me in October.

Way to go!

You got me beat officially, but we have known each other for about 18/19 years too. She didn't like the sight of me for the first year. But like a wart, I grew on her.

Linda in NY · 06-22-2007, 05:29 AM

My mom was Japanese from Tokyo, my dad was in the military.
They met during the Korean War when my dad was stationed in Japan.
My grandmother hated my dad for years, something about WWII

But she grew fond of him, and my mom became more American than many people born here, she could swear with the best of them, cook American foods, held a job until she retired.

They have both since passed away, but they were great together. She'd used to go back to Japan every year to visit.

So my opinion, it could work. Keep us posted.

ewomack · 06-22-2007, 06:50 AM

I've had enough trouble with relationships within my own culture.

But Inter-racial marriages definitely work (I see so many examples) and they seem incredibly rewarding. I do think sexual curiosity attracts many at first, and you have to be careful that that's not the motivation behind it. Hopefully you can date and know before plunging.

In the future this will become less and less of an issue. We're interbreeding so much between "races" that we'll finally realize that we all belong to the same race. As for me, I'm English, Norwegian, Swedish, Irish, Scottish, French, Spanish, with a little bit of eastern europe. We're all mutts. Embrace mutthood!

mastermemei · 06-22-2007, 06:54 AM

for me, interracial marriages can work but it needs the cooperation of both parties because they need to both adjust on their differences

**kristeejo** · 06-22-2007, 07:09 AM

I don't expect any of your marriages to last....and that has nothing to do with ethnicity or culture. ; )

chicgeek · 06-22-2007, 07:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Linda in NY

My mom was Japanese from Tokyo, my dad was in the military.
They met during the Korean War when my dad was stationed in Japan.
My grandmother hated my dad for years, something about WWII

But she grew fond of him, and my mom became more American than many people born here, she could swear with the best of them, cook American foods, held a job until she retired.

They have both since passed away, but they were great together. She'd used to go back to Japan every year to visit.

So my opinion, it could work. Keep us posted.

You're a half Jap, too?

My parents are an interracial ensemble, but they are not inter-culture, which is more what I think you are asking about.

Love, if it's there, overrides such frivilous differences.

Linda in NY · 06-22-2007, 07:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chicgeek

You're a half Jap, too?

Yup, half Japanese and half Italian.

When people ask what I am, I tell them Whopanese.

KeithCash · 06-22-2007, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by seda

So, I'm an Australian living in Japan and it has crossed my mind that I may marry a Japanese girl (preferably 18, still a virgin and willing to serve her husband).
But in reality how long could a interracial marriage last? Cultural differences, difficulties understanding humor, etc etc could pose a recipe for divorce. Any advice from those of you living in a mixed ethnicity relationship would be greatly appreciated.

As an Australian, you country grew from a island full of prisoners, If what I have read in history books is true.

You guys formed from diversity, so why should a little diversity in marriage matter.

Embrace the culture of Nippon. We Americans from the South are hard headed, we do not like to be told what we can and cannot do..

If you want her then do it. But asking these questions, you have doubt, American divorce all the time from the same culture. It would seem the same culture sould stay married. Not.

Good luck Mate.

Cheers

KeithCash · 06-22-2007, 08:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrongInTheArm

Communication, understanding and respect. Its a start, but only a start.

Realize it is the more difficult path, consequently it takes greater effort.

Having walked this path, and still walking it after 15 years, I would advise you to only start this journey if your heart is truely, 100% involved and your mind is not clouded by lust.

What happen to Your Jessica Alba crush???

Cheers for 26 years in August for me

StrongInTheArm · 06-22-2007, 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KeithCash

What happen to Your Jessica Alba crush???

There's nothing wrong with a healthy fantasy or three.

It can spice things up a bit

KeithCash · 06-22-2007, 09:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrongInTheArm

There's nothing wrong with a healthy fantasy or three.

It can spice things up a bit

In Silver Surfer, your healthy fantasy is absent clothes for about 15 seconds in the movie

spice is life

Cheers

Linda in NY · 06-22-2007, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by StrongInTheArm

There's nothing wrong with a healthy fantasy or three.

It can spice things up a bit

You use spices in your fantasies ?? Which spices ?